Happy Lord's Day!

Last night Ray and I had an impromptu date night and left the kids with a babysitter and enjoyed all of our favorite things together.  In the days of pre-kids, we'd go out to dinner, visit Lifeway and browse new books, and then head for coffee and enjoy the conversation.  So in the opportunity, we did the same thing.  And on the way to the coffee shop we broke open on the of the new CDs we bought (laughing that we haven't bought any new CDs in ages!) and found this song by Mandisa that had us both teary on the way to coffee at Mill Mountain.

We hope you enjoy it like we did.

Specific Prayer Request

My son Ben, the pastor, tells me that it is helpful to have specifics when praying for someone. While we are so thankful for the prayers for healing coming our way, we are beginning to feel the need for a prayer that I will be able to get an appointment with the medical oncologist here in a timely fashion.

So far we have not been able to schedule an appointment here to get the chemo started. Dr. Schoenberg emailed me that he spoke at length with the doctor here and that a plan has been created for my chemo. That was on Tuesday, the same day that I saw Dr. Schoenberg. However, we have not been able to get an appointment because the office here needs an official referral. That was to have arrived Friday morning. Friday afternoon I called and was told that the office here also needs a phone call from Johns Hopkins, so the scheduler can ask some questions. I relayed that to Dr. Schoenberg's office late Friday afternoon. Not surprisingly, we have not yet heard anything.

I spoke to Gaye Blevins from Westhampton Christian Church last night. She is a breast cancer survivor who was willing to share information about her experience with chemo. She also suggested that the need for referral and phone calls has to do with insurance requirements. She also shared that she had to cancel her first appointment with the oncologist and was not able to get another appointment for a couple of months. That gave me an insight to how busy his schedule is.

That is the reason I am requesting specific prayer that we are able to get a timely appointment. Dr. Schoenberg told us on Tuesday that "The house is not burning down" as far as the cancer is concerned. However, I feel like I am not being diligent if I let that "short in the wiring" just stay there until it does catch fire.

Comfort Food

From Kelli:
My friend, Dawn, has this quotation on her website.  I love it.
"Tribulation is never a noble thing; but let tribulation be what it may - exhausting, galling, fatiguing, it is not able to separate us from the love of God. Never let cares or tribulations separate you from the fact that God loves you."


Can I share with you two songs I keep playing over and over (and over)?  Only if you want to listen.  
They both talk about death, but I am listening not because of that at all, but for the subject of the joy and strength Christ brings during our struggles.


This is darling Mandissa, "He is with You."

This is my favorite: Third Day, "Cry Out to Jesus."

I was laughing at myself in the hospital because here I was, utterly terrified at only MEETiNG the doctor -- not that anything painful was going to happen that day.  And here I was there without a verse to quote, as some Christians says in our own jargon-ese: I needed a verse to claim!  And Ray and I had this little Bible in his book bag and I remembered how much I've always loved and found hope in Isaiah, so I went to Isaiah 41, as it seemed a familiar location.  

This was the verse we put in Ben's card for his ordination as a pastor, but it was good for us yesterday morning as well.  

Isaiah 41: 9 - 10

I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you.  I said, 'You are my servant'; I have chosen you and have not rejected you.  So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Support and Blessings

A friend loves at all times, 

and a brother is born for adversity.  

Pr. 17:17

We have really been overwhelmed by the support and love shown us since the news.  I mean, it's really been incredible to experience.  Previous students, both recent and not-so-much have come out and expressed to Ray just how sorry they are are about the news and to share what his class, and he has a person has done for them.  Parents emailing on behalf of their children, to share what difference they can see in their children from being in his class.  Ray told me he received one particular letter at school a couple of days ago and just cried in class at how touching it was to him.

One of his students, Kayla, began a Facebook page: Pray for Mr. Moore.   And so many students, young and old, as well as fellow teachers have expressed to him just how much he means and how they are praying for him.  In just a couple of days, there are well over 200 members of the group.  Simply incredible.

Then we have been receiving cards from people whom we've not spoken with in a long time.  And incredible offers of help -- people offering to watch our kids or our dogs, offering to clean our house or drive us places, bring us meals.  It's all truly humbling.

The thing is that as a teacher, you might get a card or two, but for the most part you never really know if you've touched any lives or not, if seeds have been planted or not, if people remember you or your class fondly or not.  You just hope that you make a difference; you hope and pray you're doing things to reach others.

And with friends, sometimes schedules get in the way, and you don't end up seeing some folks for long periods of time and it feels as if those friendships are maybe lost.

And then this.  This horrible, horrible cancer allows people to come out, to reconnect, to express things they maybe always meant to say and never did.  It's really a beautiful, touching underside to this heartache.

Let me also say that we FEEL lifted and supported in prayer.  It's remarkable and deeply comforting to know that so many people are petitioning God on our behalf.  We entirely believe God hears our prayers, and are grateful for those of you praying.  It's no small thing to us.

Thank you, from two deeply humble and grateful folks.  Thank you for your love.
We had no idea.

Loop-de-Loops are Less Fun on Wooden Roller Coasters

Excuse all of my mixed metaphors, when I tell you that Math would be less of a nuisance if I always had the answers to the variables.  Figuring out what values are x and y, is precisely what I hate about the subject entirely.  Unknowns are lousy.  


Likewise, if you can bare through my analogies, wooden roller coasters are really fun when you're younger.  The older you get, the more they just beat you around and hurt your neck.  


*sigh*  Unknowns and wooden roller coaster beatings are part of the general structure of life, but I maintain that they are still NOT my favorite -- particularly when it all begins to get complicated. 


I finally make my way to the point:  Ray's surgery is scheduled for March 22, a long ways from now.  As his cancer began to make its presence known in November, the five month delay in removing it feels far too long.  We've been told via the doctor and through our research online, that ideally, you want to extract the cancer no later than 3 months from diagnosis.  Ray and I talked briefly over the phone and plan to keep the surgery as scheduled, but also keep our appointment with Johns Hopkins for Tuesday, a week from today.  We'll see if there is a chance at getting surgery sooner there.  We also will be researching another doctor, a friend of a friend, who called Ray from the Goshen Cancer Center in the mid-west to give an over-the-phone consultation of sorts.  He may also be available for the surgery sooner.  


We are so fortunate to have such wonderful Christian friends.  Mrs. Ellouise, a pilar, emailed me this morning and said: "When we face something as major as this, it is so comforting to know that nothing comes into our lives that isn't first sifted through the loving fingers of our Heavenly Father and then be able to rest in the ultimate purpose of bringing honor and glory to Him.  I pray that our Heavenly Father will give you both a supernatural measure of strength as you walk this journey.  I am thankful for all the marvelous medical technology that is available now."


Indeed.


**UPDATED** I called Johns Hopkins and the scheduling personnel said that typically they can schedule surgery 4- 8 weeks from consultation.  Best case scenario there is possibly getting Ray into surgery around the beginning of February.  We're still looking and talking, but that's the update.

Happy New Year and Welcome 2010!

Gees, I love this guy.

Ray and I just talk extensively about how ridiculously wild our marriage has been together.  Between the minor drama of convincing our loved ones of our deep, solid relationship prior to marriage, and our roller-coaster turmoil bringing our precious children home from the distant Guatemala with five flights to and from, the solid ADVENTURE of reigning in two crazy wild boys and attempting to teach them of the love of Jesus, and then the dramatic unfolding of Loretta's estate with Ray as executor and my unending desire for that drama to end, all to this: the arrival of the most unwanted cancer.  *sigh*  It's been a lot.

We're thankful, however, for our deep love for Christ as our foundation and deep love for each other as anchors through the storms.  Ray notes: it's amazing how God completed all of these challenges, just days before this newest challenge.

Right now we rest securely in God's hands.  Having been brought to our knees and undone by so many things before now, we know exactly where we need to head: God's sovereign embrace.

See now I  myself and He!

There is no god besides me.

I put to death and I bring to life

I have wounded and I will heal

and no one can deliver out of my hand.

Deut. 32:39

Heal me, O Lord, and I will be healed;

save me and I will be saved,

for you are the one I praise.

Jeremiah 17:14

We've been thrust to the rock bed of faith quite quickly, as this cancer came on suddenly and with grim news.  I won't pretend that any part of Ray putting his affairs in order didn't wrench my heart, nor that his conversations with his children about his illness and will didn't make me want to crumble.  It's been news that steals your breath and makes time cease.  I even confessed to a friend that the idea of Christmas seemed daunting and unwanted as I looked onward with grey, stricken eyes.

But prayer, burying ourselves in scripture, being with family and friends, and the blessing of hope have all remedied our hearts.  Friends, PK and Bill visited the other night and PK said to us, "Throw everything you know about God out the window, and begin again."  Ray and I are doing that.  We're learning afresh, and regardless of the conclusion of this journey, we eagerly seek to learn about and know God more intimately and truer than we have before.

We have hope of a cure.

We also know that what Ray must undergo is massive, and fairly ridiculous.  The idea of removing multiple organs and fashioning new ones out of "extra" body parts feels more like science fiction than reality.  We don't know, nor can imagine, what state Ray will be in during his two months of recovery.  We do beg of you all to pray to the God who hears us -- that Ray be free of any medical complications, that his healing process be smooth, that the surgery be effective.

We have been so humbled by those offering prayers on our behalf, and those who've been supportive through phone calls and emails.  We're grateful in so many ways for those who've watch the kids for us or have offered to drive Ray to UVA or bring us food, or clean our home.  God bless you.  Your kindnesses have made Ray and I feel loved in ways we never dreamed.  Thank you.

Tomorrow, Ray calls to schedule the surgery.  We've prepared a number of questions to ask the nurse regarding our hospital stay and post-surgery.  So hopefully we'll be prepared with some news to share in the afternoon.  *fingers crossed*